The hardest thing is to take less when you can get more.
One of the commonest ailments of the present day is the premature formation of opinion.
Next to a circus there ain’t nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.
If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy.
We’d all like to vote for the best man but he’s never a candidate.
Intelligent people are always on the unpopular side of anything.
Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet.
Fun is like life insurance; the older you get, the more it costs.
There is no failure except in no longer trying. There is no defeat except from within, no really insurmountable barrier save our own inherent weakness of purpose.
Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.
The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you.
The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.
It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.
There are two ways to handle a woman, and nobody knows either of them.
Some people are so sensitive that they feel snubbed if an epidemic overlooks them.
In order to live off a garden, you practically have to live in it.
Some fellows get credit for being conservative when they are only stupid.
Don’t knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn’t start a conversation if it didn’t change once in a while.
When you consider what a chance women have to poison their husbands, it’s a wonder there isn’t more of it done
There isn’t much to be seen in a little town, but what you hear makes up for it.
The less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the flag.
Some people pay a compliment as if they expected a receipt.
My idea of walking into the jaws of death is marrying some woman who has lost three husbands.
The worst waste of breath, next to playing a saxophone, is advising a son
Peace has its victories no less than war, but it doesn’t have as many monuments to unveil.