Frank Zappa Quotes

A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it is not open.

Music is the only religion that delivers the goods.

The illusion of freedom will continue as long as it’s profitable to continue the illusion. At the point where the illusion becomes too expensive to maintain, they will just take down the scenery, they will pull back the curtains, they will move the tables and chairs out of the way and you will see the brick wall at the back of the theater.

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons and 85% morons.

Americans like to talk about (or be told about) Democracy but, when put to the test, usually find it to be an ‘inconvenience.’ We have opted instead for an authoritarian system disguised as a Democracy. We pay through the nose for an enormous joke-of-a-government, let it push us around, and then wonder how all those assholes got in there.

There are only two things to remember. Number one…Don’t Stop, and number two…Keep Going!

The most important thing to do in your life is to not interfere with somebody else’s life.

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

Reality is what it is, not what you want it to be.

I’m vile and perverted. I’m obsessed and deranged. I’ve existed for years but very little has changed. I’m the tool of the government and industry too. For I’m destined to rule and regulate you. You may think I’m pernicious, but you can’t look away. I’ll make you think I’m delicious with the stuff that I say. I’m the best you can get… have you guessed me yet? I’m the slime oozing out of your TV set.

Stupidity has a certain charm – ignorance does not.

Power will be maintained by the groovy guy or gal who gets the most media coverage for his sleaze. Naturally, his friends in various businesses will do okay, too.

Politics is the entertainment branch of industry.

Modern Americans behave as if intelligence were some sort of hideous deformity.

It gets harder the more you know. Because the more you find out the uglier everything seems.

Information is not knowledge. Knowledge is not wisdom. Wisdom is not truth. Truth is not beauty. Beauty is not love. Love is not music. Music is THE BEST.

Schools train people to be ignorant, with style. They give you the equipment that you need to be a functional ignoramus. American schools* do not equip you to deal with things like logic; they don’t give you the criteria by which to judge between good and bad in any medium or format; and they prepare you to be a usable victim for military-industrial complex that needs manpower.

Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid.

Republicans stand for raw, unbridled evil and greed and ignorance smothered in balloons and ribbons.

Republican is fine, if your a millionaire. Democrats is fair, if all you own is what you wear. Neither of them’s really right, cause neither of them care.

I’m not black, but there’s a whole lot of times I wish I could say I’m not white.

If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.

It’s better to have something to remember than anything to regret.

You know, people are basically shitty. It’s when they prove it over and over again that it gets obnoxious.

Censoring what you say is one of the ways in which people who are not nice can take away your personal freedom.